


Human

by SacredPanda



Series: The Hunt [11]
Category: Exalted, Star Wars Legends: Republic Commando Series - Karen Traviss
Genre: Anal Sex, Bar Fight, M/M, Public Sex, self punishment
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-05
Updated: 2018-04-05
Packaged: 2019-04-19 00:13:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,822
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14224908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SacredPanda/pseuds/SacredPanda
Summary: Roxil wants to be punished and he wants toremember.  Its been so long since he was human, its been so long since anyone could hurt him. He'll never again actually be powerless, but he needs to remember how it feels.





	Human

About a quarter under two meters. Pale brown hair and red-brown eyes. Lightly tanned skin… no one would recognize this as Roxil. He sat alone at the bar, he had been with three women already that day but he hadn’t found what he needed. The waitress smiled at him and asked if he wanted another drink. He only had a few credits left, he wasn’t used to _paying_ for anything. He put what he had down on the counter.  
“What abhorrent beverage will this buy?”  
“Nothing you want, friend. He’ll have double of Corellian whiskey, on me.” A nearby man said as he slid to a closer stool. He wasn’t unattractive, just a little rough.  
“I’m not a charity.” Roxil hissed, he was honestly grateful, he didn’t really know why he snapped. “But thanks.”  
“I don’t do charity.” He leaned a little closer and whispered, the alcohol was strong on his breath. “I’d do you though.” Even when he wasn’t in his true form people rarely approached _him_ , this was promising. Roxil downed his whiskey in one large gulp, it was disgusting.  
“Buy me another and we’ll talk.”

“I’m not interested in being gentle.” The stranger shoved Roxil’s chest against the alley wall and bit the nape of his neck.  
“Good,” He wasn’t particularly strong or tough in this shape, the human stranger easily overpowered him. “Use me.”  
“Get on your knees.” The man unzipped his pants and snarled a vicious laugh when Roxil eagerly reached up to help free him. He captured Roxil’s wrists in one hand holding them up against the wall, tangling the fingers of his free hand in Roxil’s hair to hold him in place. He forced himself hard into Roxil’s mouth as though he expected some sort of resistance almost surprised when the smaller man parted his lips. Roxil didn’t gag or gasp or fight it at all when his partner abused his mouth, shoving deep into his throat pausing for several seconds each time Roxil moaned around him. It cut off his breath but he didn’t care.   
Without warning the guy yanked Roxil onto his feet, bending him forward to lean against the wall. He pushed Roxil’s pants down to his knees. He pushed in his middle finger into him, he wasn’t slow; that was perfect, Roxil didn’t need it. He rubbed around for a moment until he felt the little rubbery spot and focused in on it. Roxil gasped, this guy knew what he was doing. He kept rubbing until Roxil bucked back into his hand. The loss of the touch disappointed Roxil until he realized the man was already lining himself up.  
He started fast and rough, no hesitation. He supported himself with his hands against the wall already thrusting hard. It stung but was well worth it. The pain would pass in a few seconds, the warmth was already building in Roxil’s abdomen. It had been a long time since Roxil had been with such an experienced man. Prudii was good, but he was too kind about it. He had been used to hopping from trooper to trooper, he had no idea how well a regular could take it. Roxil didn’t need the careful preparation, it was just foreplay for him, a prelude to the main event.   
Roxil bit his lip hard, it would probably bleed or bruise, but this wasn’t Creation. There was someone around every corner to be offended or disturbed. Roxil crossed his arms against the wall and leaned his forehead into them, the copper taste from his lip filling his mouth. The man was gripping Roxil’s hips with all his human strength, squeezing his thighs, and pressing into his back forcing him harder against his arms. Roxil couldn’t take it anymore, he leaned his head back and moaned at each pass of the cock inside him, at least until the man clamped a hand over his mouth.   
“How’re you doing?” He asked in a strained voice.  
“Not there yet,”  
“What do you need?” That was an unexpected question.  
“Harder…” Roxil barely finished the word before the man pulled his hips further back, snapping his own forward with impressive strength. He repeated the motion a few cautious times before picking up his speed again. Roxil bit into his arm to subdue his moans. The angle was perfect, dragging against his prostate quick and wonderful. It was another few minutes before Roxil reached down to stroke himself with the rhythm. He didn’t need long, not this time. “About to…” he gasped when the man wrapped his fingers around Roxil’s hand squeezing him tighter, rubbing faster. He started thrusting deeper when he felt Roxil tense around him and a few seconds later they were both groaning between ragged breaths together.   
“Maybe I’ll see you next time you’re flat broke and need a buzz.” He said zipping himself up, already heading back to the cantina.   
“Maybe.” Once the guy was out of sight Roxil shifted back to his true form. He could feel bruises forming on his lips, where his arms had been pressed against the wall, and where the powerful grip had been on his waist. He might not say it, but it felt good to be sore. He had been a divine being for so long, it felt fair to have a little discomfort. He let the sensation wash over him as the bruises followed over to his true form. He couldn’t escape it, he didn’t want to; but it still wasn’t enough. Somewhere deep inside he wanted to hurt like he had hurt Jaing. He returned to the false human shape and went down a few levels to a seedier looking cantina.  
He grabbed the first drink he saw, a dark ale by a man that was turned away. He chugged the dark that warmed his throat and his gut.  
“What the fuck?” The guy grabbed Roxil’s arm as he started walking away.  
“Fuck you.” The guy didn’t take kindly to that, he yanked Roxil hard so he fell against the table knocking it to the ground with him. Glasses broke under his fall digging into his back, the alcohol burned on the multitude of cuts. Someone else dragged him up to his feet with his arms pulled behind him. The fist hit his face first, crashing into his jaw with a sick crunching sound. Roxil coughed when he was pulled forward at the same time a knee slammed into his stomach. The next few minutes were a complete blur of bashing and blinding pain. This wasn’t good and he knew it, but he wanted it. He wanted to feel pain, glass breaking against his skin and fists pounding into his flesh from all directions. His head fell forward, his vision blurred but hand tangled into his hair to force him to face the fist coming toward him again and again. He should have come here in the first place, this is where the rough types were. This is where he’d find people looking for any reason to get into a fight. He hadn’t felt anything like this since the last time he encountered Ebon Tsunami, although this still didn’t compare to the torment she caused him.

The wall was cold against his back, too soothing. He lifted the commlink and stared at it for a moment. Once more in his true form he still felt everything. His face was bruised and swollen, his body was littered in cuts and scrapes. He would get an earful, he was sure. He really didn’t want to go back, but it would take too much essence to open the den. He didn’t have a lot of available options so he pushed the buttons Kal had shown him.  
“Jat’ika…”  
“Where have you been, _di’kut_?”  
“Lower levels, can’t read the sign. Could you find me?”  
“I’ll track the comm signal. You can’t get back on your own?”  
“Don’t remember what way I went, didn’t pay attention.” And his legs and chest ached. By the time Jatne stepped out of his speeder nearby Roxil’s bruises were dark and noticeable.  
“ _Shab_ , what happened?”  
“Got into a fight…”  
“With a herd of banthas? I shot you with a PEP and you barely bruised.”  
“I wasn’t in my own body. Human shape… Galio … Gelio… don’t remember, long time ago.”  
“And you didn’t turn back?”  
“I… Jat’ika can you just take me home?” He was too sore to stand on his own so he let Jatne carefully attempt to pull him up. He was bundled into the speeder and sat silently the whole way back to Kal’s apartment. Jaing wouldn’t be there, so it was fine. He wasn’t aware however that Ordo was there, and Ordo was pissed. He was busy working at a terminal, didn’t even bother to turn before he started complaining about the state Jaing had been in when he deployed that morning. Roxil knew he deserved every word. What if Jaing was in pain? What if something happened, what if he got hurt worse? Ordo finally turned but his expression didn’t betray his thoughts when his eyes scanned over Roxil.  
“What happened?”  
“ _Di’kut_ got into a fight in a _normal_ human body.” The way Jatne said normal, it obvious he meant unlike the clones; weaker, less durable.   
“Stupid,” Ordo huffed. Roxil wasn’t bad at fighting, and technique did a lot for you, but you needed the strength and dexterity to use it. “What, you think getting hurt makes up for what you did.” He was as perceptive as always. Being read so easily only made him feel worse. “Stupid.” He went to the freshers and came back with several cloths and a bottle of bacta. He tossed them at Roxil. “You think seeing you get hurt would make him feel better? Is that what you think of him?”  
“This isn’t about Jaing!” Roxil leaned back, the sound when his head hit the wall was sickening. He closed his eyes and held a cloth damp with bacta against his face. He would probably heal in an hour, but it felt nice. It was also the kindest gesture he would ever get with Ordo, he didn’t like Roxil like some of his brothers. “I just needed to remember.”  
“Explain.” Ordo had been walking away again, but he turned back and tilted his head.  
“Its hard to remember sometimes what it was like to be human. It was because of Jaing, it wasn’t about him. I let myself be unprepared and something unspeakably terrible happened. He may never trust me again now.”  
“That’s true. But he won’t walk away from you. We don’t work that way.”  
“That doesn’t make it better. I’m not comforted knowing he’ll continue to love me just because he’s built that way. It’s so much worse, now it’ll feel like a betrayal to continue seeking his affection. I don’t want to _use_ him.” Ordo actually seemed to often a little at that.  
“Good. Remember that.”


End file.
